It’s Gilda Sue’s Mail Bag! “What Would Mark Twain Do?”

Hello, lovelies.

This week’s Mail Bag pick is from a Charlie Perkins in Georgia. Charlie writes:

“Is it wrong for me to wear tube socks and high heels? My niece and nephew say that it is. Some people point and laugh at me, especially at the beach. I think that it is both fashionable and comfortable. I told my niece, ‘There is no rule book that says that men cannot wear women’s shoes.’ Tube socks add a masculine touch to my day wear. Some people just don’t get fashion. Don’t you agree?”

Oy, Charlie. I had to turn to some other folks for some help with this problem of yours.

Super-brainy literary icon and extra-terrestrial humorist Mark Twain once wrote this:

“We are all alike on the inside.”

By this, I believe he means that we all need love, we are all seeking something of substance that makes life worth living,  we all have skeletons in our closets, we all crave more Drambuie than Rabbi Spiderman thinks is good for us, and, though our many prejudices may keep us from acting like it most of the time, we all agree that we probably are all alike on the inside. He means that it’s really the OUTSIDE that matters.

So, fashion is important, hon. Real-real.

Now the rightness or wrongness of those tube socks is debatable. Here are quotes from two other famous brainy folks:

“Are right and wrong convertible terms, dependent upon popular opinion?”  ~William Lloyd Garrison (abolitionist and feminist)

It doesn’t seem as though Garrison knows the answer to this, but I do. It’s “of course they are.”

“The only correct actions are those that demand no explanation and no apology.”  ~Red Auerbach (National Jewish Sports Hall of Famer and basketball coach)

I think Coach Auerbach would read your long-winded query and advise you to keep that beach attire in your closet. Right behind those skeletons.

But, Charlie, I once wrote this:

“If it feels real-real good, just damn do it!”

So. Do with all of that what you will. Just remember, sunscreen is essential when frolicking on the beach, but bossy nieces and nephews are for suckers.

Thanks for your letter, Charlie. Y’all keep ’em coming. Leave a comment here or at The Gilda Sue Rosenstern Computer Internet Show.

Cheers!

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About gildasuerosenstern

The Deep South's gabbiest half Jewish talk show hostess on a never-ending quest for fame, cosmic truth, the mensch of her dreams, and a "real-real rockin'" cocktail!

Posted on June 16, 2011, in It's Gilda Sue's Mail Bag!, Uncategorized and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.

  1. Charlie Perkins

    Thank you, Gilda Sue. I have the deepest respect for you and your opinion. I am working on my beach attire before heading there for the forth of July. I am trying to be a little more conservative this year. I am trying to blend in a bit more, while attempting to maintain my patriotic feelings. I have created a flag covered jogging outfit. I think that it will go well with my gold shoes and gold wide-brimmed hat. The hat is as shiny as a mirror. If anyone laughs at me, I will tilt my head their way and blind them with the reflection of the sun. But I don’t think that will happen out of respect for our nation’s flag.

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